The legal community and beyond have been buzzing with the bizarre tale of the "Biglaw Biter," a summer associate at Sidley Austin who made headlines after a series of biting incidents involving her colleagues. This case has not only captivated legal professionals but has also caught the attention of international media, turning it into a sensation that transcends the confines of typical workplace misconduct stories.

The associate, whose antics included biting up to ten coworkers, has been dismissed, sparking widespread speculation about her future in law and any other professional settings. This isn't the first time she's made her vampire-like tendencies known, reportedly mentioning them during icebreakers at the start of summer. This prelude makes her subsequent actions less surprising but no less concerning.

Workplace advice expert Alison Green of Ask A Manager weighed in on the issue, providing some stern yet necessary guidance. "Don’t bite anyone at work ever again! It’s a form of assault," Green emphasized. She pointed out the critical need for the Biglaw Biter to undertake serious remedial education on appropriate workplace behavior. According to Green, the only permissible biting is between consenting adults, in a non-work context, making it clear that such behavior has no place in any professional environment.

Furthermore, Green offered broader advice applicable to all professionals: minimize physical contact in the workplace. "Aside from handshakes, I’d say default to not touching coworkers," she advised. This guidance helps delineate clear boundaries, which are crucial in maintaining professional and comfortable interactions at work. Green suggested alternative ways to express collegiality and warmth, such as using encouraging words, tones, and smiles, which are less likely to be misinterpreted or make colleagues uncomfortable.

As the Biglaw Biter contemplates her next steps, this incident serves as a stark reminder of the basic yet crucial rules governing professional conduct. Whether or not she can reshape her quirky traits into a more acceptable form remains to be seen. However, one thing is clear: a fundamental understanding of workplace boundaries is essential, and sometimes, the most basic advice bears repeating.